As I was checking my blog the other day (some one's got to look at it some time...) I read my little "self description" about being a nose pierced, Jesus loving, afraid of heights, football fanatic and I thought it might be time for a little more self revelation. Hopefully by now you all realize I love Jesus and football (yes, in that order!), and the nail-in-the-coffin afraid of heights story is too embarrassing to tell today, so I thought I would tackle the nose piercing.
So here are three lies and one truth about nose piercing.
Lie #1 Only Druggies, Bikers, and Pre-Pubescents Pierce Themselves
Obviously not true, as I am neither a druggie, a biker, and I have just barely passed the pre-pubescent cut off. (Hush now.) I know some of my Yankee friends may wonder how this is a misconception, but this was one of the differences I noticed once we crossed the Mason-Dixon line. Up north, piercings were no big deal, most everybody I knew had one, and no one thought twice about any "stereotype" that may go along with such an accessory. Down here, it seems a little different.
Now, sweet Southern friends don't get all mad at me. You know I love you, and more times than not I sound like you, but ya'll just don't do much facial decorating. (If you are still upset with me, just make some grits and corn bread and I will come over and we'll make up while we sip sweet tea.) When we first moved here, I didn't see ANYONE with a pierced nose. It was almost spooky. It just isn't a part of "regular" society down this way. Some things come with living in the Bible belt. The absence of tattoos or piercings seem to be one of those things.
One time I got into a discussion with some fine southern Christian women who believed that having a tattoo was comparable to having the "mark of the beast" from Revelation. Really? Did you really need to go there? Really? Yes, I know Lev. 19:28. But have you ever read Lev. 19:27? "Do not cut the hair at the sides of your head or clip off the edges of your beard." Now no one ever seems to question my clean cut husband's spiritual maturity or eternal future. (My arch nemesis Bohlender would be so screwed!) Piercings periodically garner a similar response.
Here's the deal. If people are really looking for reasons to condemn me to hell, I have lots better sins than my tattoos and piercings. I could really hit it out of the park for them if they want. I have a nose piercing. I am not a biker or a rebel or a druggie. I am a sinner. And so are the people with nail polish, freckles, teeth, leg hair, etc. etc.
Lie #2 It Doesn't Hurt to Pierce Your Nose.
That's bunk. It does. Unless you really are a druggie. Then, maybe not so much. But for me, sober and trembling, it didn't tickle.
The best way to describe it is to say it feels like what I think a punch in the face would feel like. I have never been on the receiving end of a face punch (I did however give one to a poor fraternity guy in the Alpha Sigs haunted house, but really, what did he expect when he shoved a live snake in my face?). When I got my nose done, my eyes watered, my face felt hot, and my nose went into some sort of self-protective numbness. But it wasn't bad. Not as bad as when I got my belly button pierced. (Told you I could hit it out of the park with sin...) The belly button piercing hurt so bad I was sure the Rapture was happening and I didn't make the cut. Ouch.
Lie #3 When You Sneeze, a Booger Comes Out the Hole.
For those of you who are tactile learners, let's work through this one with a little "hands on" exercise. Get yourself a nice booger. (If you have toddlers, that shouldn't be too difficult.) Now find someone who has pierced ears - you or perhaps your spouse, who must really love you to participate in this exercise. Now, shove the booger through the earring hole. While there is an earring in it. How's that working for you?
Simple answer - no. Boogers do not fly out my nose piercing. Not even when I sneeze. It does get sore when I have a cold and wipe my nose a lot, but nothing green ever comes out.
Truth #1 My Piercing Isn't About You or What You Think. It Is About Me.
You really want to know why I got my nose pierced? Honestly? It is because I like jewelry. I like accessories. I like things that sparkle. I think it is pretty.
You want to know why it took me three years to finally go through with it? Because it took me that long to stop caring what everyone else would think of a SAHM in her 30s with a nose piercing.
I can honestly say, my nose piercing isn't some sort of "statement" or counter-culture message to the people. And while it may seem obvious that my nose piercing shouldn't be about what others think, for a recovering people pleaser this piercing has been liberating.
So that is the scoop on the nose piercing. Three lies and one truth about my little decoration. Another day I will be transparent enough to tell you why I am afraid of heights...