Saturday, February 14, 2009

Praying for Who Again????

A dear friend and I have been talking lately about our marriages. Now don't get the wrong idea - we aren't doing the "gossip and bad mouth the neanderthal, knuckle dragging husband" kind of talking (not all women do this), but more of the "we could use some help through a few rough patches" kind of talking.

(As an aside, let me interject a crucial rule between women when it comes to sharing about their spouses. Another friend from Cincy and I came up with this agreement in our friendship early on, and I carry it over into all of the close female relationships I have. We have an unspoken, non-negotiable understanding that we will be sympathetic and encouraging to each other about our marriages, and no matter what is shared it is understood that at the end of our conversation we will always love each other and respect each other's husband. We have a healthy fear of that "what God has joined together, let no man put asunder" admonition.)

Back to my original thought (original for this post, not for the human race). So my dear friend here in TN and I have come to the realization that while we have generally healthy marriages, there are some definite and specific needs in each of our homes that we could use some Divine revelation and healing on. So we have committed to getting together and praying for our marriages.

Here's the funny part. Ever since we decided to pray for our marriages, I have had a mental list going of what I need to commit to the Lord. (Oh, wait. Here's the funny part.) My mental list is much more about praying about my husband than my marriage. And by "praying about my husband" if I am honest I gotta say it might just possibly be a bit more like "praying for my husband". And if we are going for really, really authentic I probably ought to confess that when I say "praying for my husband" I probably mean "praying God fixes my husband".

Holy bad wife, Batman.

I have been hit between the eyes with the fact that praying for my marriage will most likely walk itself out by praying that God will change me. Instead of asking God to "fix" my husband (who really isn't in need of much "fixing" when I think about it) I have a sneaky suspicion I will be the one receiving the gentle correction.

This praying for my marriage thing is going to get a little dicey.


Kira's Mum said...

What a great idea to pray together! Also, very brave of you to be so honest. Thank you.

Jeannie said...

Have you ever read "Power of a praying Wife"? I am reading it right now, the first chapter is "praying for your husband's wife" I am really really enjoying it and finding myself praying for my hubby in ways I never would have thought of. Very powerful stuff.