Mark and I just finished watching the season finale of NBC's "The Biggest Loser". We have always enjoyed the show - there is something inspiring about seeing hard work and struggle translate into astonishing physical change.
But tonight as I watched the finale I felt terribly unsettled. I still am not sure I can put my finger on it, but it may be (gulp) conviction about the health choices I am making in my life right now.
I am aware that what is going on with me physically is probably well beyond the scope of diet and exercise as a permanent and complete fix. But I was confronted today (by the show and a conversation with a dear friend) that my diet can border on thoughtless and gluttonous, and my exercise (or lack thereof) toes the line of laziness.
I have a million excuses if you are interested! I struggle with constant fatigue and shortness of breath, which discourages one from slipping into the dusty Nike gear and heading out for some exercise. I am exhausted by the time dinner rolls around and it is easier to eat easy, processed poo than to put forth the effort to prepare a healthier option. I need to drink all that soda for a caffeine boost (after all, I struggle with fatigue!). And what is the point of a multi-vitamin when I have already tried a million prescription medicines to "get my health back"? It is hard for me to accept that I can't take off and run right now, and I would rather do nothing than struggle to find a substitute for the joy and health running brought me. Water is boring.
And after all those excuses, I am still left feeling...unexcused.
I feel convicted that I am content with laziness and gluttony, and not willing to sacrifice to make more worshipful choices with my life. It is starting to feel like a spiritual issue and not just a physical issue. And I think I need to address this.
I am going to be praying about what choices God would have me make in my life right now. I know from this heavy feeling that it is time to honor God with whatever health I do have. No excuses.
I hope to have some clear answers, and I may even use this blog for some accountability. (Back off - I didn't start yet!!!)